We all know it exists! After all, there is a huge outcry over The Biggest Loser of season 15’s weight loss. Yet, all the others did the exact same UNHEALTHY behaviors to lose as much weight as they did. No one is saying bad things about them. People only care if you’re “too thin”.
I suppose I can’t blame the average person; freaking eating disorder specialists do it!
For example, soon after I was weight restored from Anorexia, talking about going to 3 cycling classes per day would get me shrewd glare and a lecture about moderation! Conversely, if I went to the gym for 3 hours at my high weight, people would congratulate me for my will power! The Biggest Loser competitors are body-shamed, humiliated, and screamed at to get them to exercise for hours every day!
This hits close to home because last semester of school I lost 50 pounds. No one said a word for months. Until last week my mom’s only comments were compliments. It is impossible to lose the amount of weight I lost, in the time I lost it, in a healthy manner. However, since I began overweight (not morbidly obese), no one expressed concern or batted an eye lash when I skipped lunch and breakfast every day. After all, when you’re fat, losing weight is good! Right?!?! Not even the numerous people in my life who know I have a long history of diagnosed eating disorders and hospitalizations said anything. Fuck people. NOW they want me to stop losing weight? Yeah right, NOT GOING TO HAPPEN.
To clarify, I am fine that no one tried to stop me. I’d be content for them to remain silent!!
I am angry that they are saying something now, as though it was inconsequential at a higher weight, but now my behavior is the end of the world.
*edit* And this, folks, is why nothing changes…Minutes ago I thought, “I’ll get back on a meal plan and focus on school for a week.” I meant what I wrote in my last post; in the moment I wrote it, I was committed. Shortly after posting, my good spirits faded and I thought, “Screw this! I have to keep losing weight!